Want to lose weight?

by Justin Ball on May 30th, 2007

I like how the title sounds so very spam like. I have lost 25 lbs since I started biking. 10 lbs in the past 2 months. So if you want to know my secret pay close attention:

GET OFF YOUR FAT BUTT AND STOP EATING CRAPPY FOOD.

That is yours for only $19.95 plus shipping and handling. But wait there's more. If you send me money now I will throw this in free:

REALLY GET OF YOUR LAZY BUTT and stop surfing the internet.

No gimics, no hype, no ongoing worries that your diet pill will cause you to drop dead from a heart attack any second. Science has actually shown that eating fewer calories than you burn will cause you to lose weight. Try it. Gas is $3.50 a gallon. Ride your bike to work and stop burning dead dinosaurs.

My secret diet plan also comes with other benefits such as reduced risk of heart disease and diabetes.

Try it right now, free for 30 days. Go to your local bike shop, buy one of those things with two wheels and start riding it. If you like it after 30 days feel free to send me a check and I will send you a big letter that says I told you so.

From Cycling

  • Not to worry I only surf bike porn when I am at work or late at night when I can't ride anyway.
  • bmuramatsu
    Hmmm....

    "REALLY GET OF YOUR LAZY BUTT and stop surfing the internet."

    So does this 2008 Trek Madone really count? (He did have to do a lot of "Internet surfing" to find all the info...)
  • Only if you order the framing option which costs another $9.95. :-)
  • It's been a lifelong goal of mine to own a certificate from Justin Ball that says "I told you so." Is it frameable?
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